Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
