Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
