As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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