yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
