Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
