this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Randomize
