arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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