Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
