Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
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