So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
