He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize