We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
