Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
