Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
