the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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