he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
