these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
