how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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