Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Randomize