If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
