PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize
