my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
