i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
