How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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