i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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