Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
