I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
