I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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