She's the barista slut.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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