What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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