kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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