whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
