I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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