Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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