So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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