what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize