Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize