I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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