loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
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