I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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