you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
