He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
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