Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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