My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
This show inspires me to have sex in space
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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