She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize