I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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