I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
