i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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