It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
