ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
